one of those days.. again

another heartbreaking attack..hay been bearing this loneliness for 5 years now..and  it cant be stop..unless..

so from now on..

i dont want to tell him everything in my mind from now on..i dont want to start anything with him from now on..its just me from now on..just me and my family and my own future and my own health..

i want to meet someone that is there in my good days and esp my bad moments..just listening to me..

REALIZATION 101

pwede khit sino maging gf/bf ...pero iba tlga ung pang finale...

u want the best of the best kc nga forever n un...

gaya ng pag ddecide if magpptatoo ka or endi...

kc nga forever n ...

excerpt while reading cosmo

The key is balancing high standards with a reality check. "Dont set the bar so high that nobody will ever be able to leap over it," advises ian kerner, phd Cosmo and men;s Health sex expert and author of be honest - you're not that into him either.

"Relationships take time." Despite the fact that ur biological and emotional clocks are ticking, you owe it to yourself to give him time he needs to prove himself or hang himself."

Scenario 1

What if, after investing five years in your relationship, you still cant tell if he's a keeper?

Terry 25, law student, wont consider her bf, ian, a lost cause, but she wonders how long before he meets her halfway. "His good points outweigh the bad, but im not sure if hell ever change" she says.

Phil McGraw, Phd, best selling author of Love Smart says you need to understand the reason behind the action. "we teach people how to treat us," he explains. "Men are hard, but not impossible to train".

Dont quickly give up on a guy for seeming insensitive. In what he calls "a constant game of show-and-tell," first figure out why he's being so damn difficult and show him how to please you, advises McGraw. lecturing is not an option, McGraw adds. "Give him positive feedback" he advises.

If a man cares about you, he is definitely going to want you to be happy. You can shape his behavior by making a clear connection between the things he does and your reactions." and as these lyrics sing "raise your hopeful voice" and give him a chance. But ultimately keep in mind that "you have a choice".

"Men want sex; women want love," - Allan and Barbara Pease co authors of why men dont listen and women cant read maps. its the all or nothing demand that most guys just cant handle. "This is why commitment is such a turn-on for women"

Most women want relationship or at least the possibility of some some emotional connection before they feel the desire for sex.

Most men dont realize that once a woman feels an emotional bond has been created, she will happily bonk his brains out for the next 3 months.

The keyfor meeting eye to eye given our innate differences is voicing out our expectations. "let your man know that intimacy equals commitment, if thats really how you feel""when you define what you want and need, you weed out the men who arent willing to give it. Matitira yung matibay - and deserving"

"it is very impt not to expect our partners to resonate so much with our values that they think and feel the way we do" - John Gray PhD author of Mars and Venus

"Resonance helps soul mates harmonize their differenceces. while our difference are definitely inconvenient, they stretch us to be more whole, loving, and, considerate." And maroon 5 sings it exactly as it is, noting that its definitely "compromise that moves us along."

Learning to ♥

ANGELICA ----> bookmark this POST

The key to succeeding in relationship is not finding the right person; its learning to love the person you found.

Sustaining love is not passive or spontaneous experience "the labor of love" because it takes time, effort and energy. And most importantly it takes wisdom. You have to know what to do to make your relationship work. Sure true love can only happen after you've fallen out of love.

When you begin choosing to love even if you don't feel like doing it----that's true love.

...And that's the foundation of a lasting and strong relationship.

Make no mistake about it. Love is NOT a mystery.

Just as there are physical laws of the universe(such as gravity) there are also laws for relationships.

Just in the right diet and exercise program makes you physically stronger, certain habits in your relationship will make your marriage stronger.

It is a direct cause and effect. If you know and apply the laws, the results are predictable--you can "make" love.

Love is indeed a decission.. not just a feeling. You'll not just go away with your relationship just because the feeling is gone. In the Bible, love is a commitment. You make it happen.

GOD determines who walks into your life, its up to you who you let walk away, who you let stay and who you refuse to let go..

Do you always experience dreams or nightmares?

dreams lng...weird dreams :)))

Ask me anything

What qualities do you look for when you're dating someone?

my sense kausap

Ask me anything

Who inspire you the most : 1)at work? 2) at school? 3)at home?

the person inspires me is ian..

Ask me anything

If you were given a chance to be a guy (if you're a girl)/ to be a girl (if you're a guy), what's the first thing you will do with your new self?

check how guys feel when they make love...=D

Ask me anything

What's one song that could describe your mood right now?

like a g6

Ask me anything

Ano mas prefer mo: makipagrelasyon sa isang taong nakakasalamuha mo sa iyong paligid e.g. school, office, kaptibahay, o isang taong nakilala mo dahil lamang sa isang pagkakataon e.g. nagkakilala sa isang event, ipinakilala ng common friend, etc.

doesnt matter...

Ask me anything

Got some answers...

Just found some answers while reading old cosmo (2008)

You cant expect your partner to perfectly and completely fulfill you in everyway, says Dr. Seangelis. When they do not, we become resentful and disillusioned she says. Love is not enough to make relationship work - it needs compatibility and commitment. - commit to making relationship work regradless of the changes.

OK. Fine. I'll hang onto this... somehow questions that i have were answered...
wanted to watch movie ..uber bored and stuck @coffee bean in mega..

What phase is it

dunno how to start...
ganito ako parati.. but once i've started something.. i have to finish it...im focus to finish it whatever the outcome is.. im decided and determined to finish anything ive started...bat nga pla ang hirap hirap mag cmula ulit..

mhilig ako mag bring up ng mga bagay n mkksakit sa kapwa... specially break up with my boyfriend... feeling ko nga used to it na sya..kakasawa..i thought mature na ko sa mga ganung petty quarrel..d pla..minsn kc pag mtgal na kau ..may mga bagal na nttake for granted.. i think there something wrong with me.. i think im not ready for a serious relationship..sounds not good..i wanted it so badly before specially when i was really alone and needy way back then.. i mean way back when i was college..before i met ian.. eto ba ung catch ng maagang naiinlove..maagang pnpakinggan ang puso..maagang binibigay ang lhat .. kc baka sya na nga..dunno if im over reacting or wat..

mahirap tlga magdiscern ng isang bagay...most specially ang sarili.. coz u cant see the full view unless someone analyze you..do i nid a love expert?... kc it thought im expert bout this things..i tend to advise and based it on my own experience.. but i think i was wrong..

minsan sa mga pag uusap... tinatanong ako ng mga kaibigan ko if i have a bf and how many yrs and how did we met and so..they also said na kami na daw tlga..but i told them na dont want to jump to the next level..i mean were happy right now..are we really happy? or is he happy? or am i happy? i also told them na im afraid when it comes to marriage.. i heard alot .. they taught na happy ending na kc they were married... but they're wrong.. and that was my perception too na happy ending tlga pag kinasal na kau..but opposite of what we taught of it.. it was a dead end..

dead end in a sense na.. you'll think about your family and how you manage it.. pag di kau nag kasundo or may heavy problem crosses your way e mag end up na..sooner or later you'll hate each other and curse bad things about your mate..thats what im tryin to prevent..i dont want that to happen.. thats really heart breaking..

i have this tendency na..when i initiate a break up or cool off e ako din ung di makatiis .. ako din ung nag iinitiate n magsorry at masabi na kami ulit..well i think is im so damn selfish...coz i really miss him.. ian picture us both together when we become old..which is really sweet and touching..but im not holding anything or any words..kc bka d magkatotoo... mahilig pa nmn ako mag expect..but right now im tryin to lessen it..coz its no good for me.

hirap mag evaluate ng sarili especially sa love aspect.. im so detail oriented sa mga bgay.. khit maliit na bagay e big deal..ako parati ang nagppalala.. sounds stupid tlga..not sure din if kaya ko pang icarry ang isang relationship na sinimulan ko..isang relationship na i was able to built..ako lng ba nagbuilt?..minsan i thought na sa isang relationship e dalawang tao dpat ang nkikinabang..nagtutulungan...ako nag simula ... so that means ba na ako din ang magtpos? sounds not go and stupid...

i want to resign sa pgiging isang gf na concern sa kanyang bf at khit na anu pang related sa kanyang bf..isang gf na freak at times.. i mean all the time..im just goin to understand and digest anything khit mali or khit tama.. or kahit na ano... isang gf na super duper selosa na wla nmn daw dpat ikaselos..isang gf na supportive.. isang gf na OA sa kanilang relationship.. but i will still be her gf forever.. i mean until he said so.. i resign and be laid back...binibigay ko na ang manibela ng relationship kay mr ian novido para nmn sya ang mag drive.. you heard me.. i resign na but we're still together.. i just dont want to bother or keep bothering my self anything about relationship.. i mean i think im not created to have a perfect relationship and to be a perfect gf.. d na..from now on..

wla nmn akong msamang loob or anything.. kung baga ayoko ng maging abala sa isang bagay na alam kong ok na.. ok na in a sense na wla nmn tlga syang gagawing d ko gusto or khit na gusto ko d nya gagawin..in short ayoko lng na mag expect ng khit ano sa relationship nmen since stable na at mukha nmng mtatag na..ganun ba tlga ang isang relationship?.. sounds unsure pero oo n lng ako...do i need to look again?..sounds not good..but ill think of it soon..

wat if ....

di k na masaya...or am i just occupied of alot of things..
kailangan ko ba talga?... or i can do it on my own..
i need peace of mind and my working sane self..thats what i want right now..

doppleganger day

npaka un usual nmn kc yesterday 4 times na kaming sabihan ng magkamukha ng new found friend kong c grace largo …

early that day, ung friend ko nmn sabi kmukha ko daw ung ex nya …

today nmn may nagsabi nnmn na magkamukha kmi ni new found friend grace largo…

susko lhat na ata kmuka ko … ako na nakikita nla… hahaha kaloka

masarap pla...

ang feeling na ma-in love... d ba

side comment: napansin ko lng na nakakapag blog ako after makarinig ng music..khit anung situation at position ko now :)) lovin may fav spot :D

overrated ....

pero gusto ko p din masurprise :D d bah cnu naman gurl ang hindi mag eexcite dis vday :D

last na to..

tama.. last shot ko na ito.. at pag d tlga umayon sa dapat ..

i'll try another route ..sa mas liligaya ako

Question

Will you still keep the person that makes you happy and sad? or just let it go...

when all else failed..i hope ur still there..

super nakakatouch ung story ni chris medina ... true love tlga watch this ♥♥♥

too perfect na tas shet...gnun pa ung nangyari...

imagine 8 years na sila with their relationship and they're engage pa...

super bilib ako sa guy..saludo grbe :((((

teary eyed while wathchin this..

akala ko sa mga pelikula lng nangyayari ung mga ganyan...

life is full of surprises tlga ..u'll never know what will happen next..

so expect the unexpected..

be ready to face it n lng and pray to God \m/

Finally its open

yea as what you see.. i have the energy to open this up again... wasnt sure if im goin to let others see my blog but i have the courage to post it na.. kc sa mga d nakakaalam nagbblog n tlga ako since nung college..

so to start off..anu nga ba its been 2 years i think since my last post :))..natripan ko lng kc wla nnmn ako mkausap kundi sarili ko ..so i have to vent my ideas here har har..bare with it.. :D

theres alot of changes in me..super..so far i dont have any regrets except for one thing.. of course not to be able to grad on time.. but here's the big but..i dont feel sorry for my self dhil sa mga pangyayari kc kung d dhil dun hindi ako mgging mtatag na tao...actually d sya kawalan.. im seeing the bigger picture na e... i think unti unti akong lumalakas sa mga gnung pagkakataon..im human..ang pagkakaiba ko lng is im not following any norm ...im not tryin to please anyone but myself...im tryin to live my life the way i wanted..im happy... i know time will come for this kaya continue lang ang buhay... ako ung taong d titigil until makuha ko ung gusto ko... pero for sure d din ako msasatisfy after i grad.. hehe kc its just a diploma ...asa tao din ung initiative to move forward..

mrami akong taong nabigo, nahindian, naaway at madami pa over the years..but one thing's for sure.. pagnakakatayo na ako ng tuwid at wlang hawak definitely babalikan ko kau.. and prove that im not a failure instead a precious gem... may mga lupa lupa pa ako ngyn but over the years will surely be a priceless treasure sa mga minamahal ko...

na-uuber ang kasentihan ko kc nmn ...im really motivated magsulat while listening to music..

aside from this, i'd like to mention this..unsure nnman kc ako.. i think im fed up of loving someone..parang nmimiss ko ung singlehood..coz currently im in a relationship..parang sakto lng.. parang wlang masamang tinapay samen..tanggap ko sya and tanggap nya ko..we definitely love each other so much..but ..lagi tlgang may but...ewan ko lng talga feeling ko ako tlga ung may mali...kc eto ung nakikita ko ah... parang ung personal space nya as a human e nacover ko na din..which i think masama..kc wla akong para sken at sya for me..im not sure if its right..gusto ko ding may masabihan ng lhat lhat ..kaya bumalik ako sa blogging...mahirap pla magkarelationship..ha ha ha..msaya tlga at first..pero d ganoon forever..but d nmn ako anti ok...masaya ung feeling na narereciprocate ung love na binibigay mo...but in reality d nga gnun ...believe me... bwahaha

guyz if you're lookin for or naiinggit mgkarelationship..i have a piece of advice.. dont ask for it...totoo ang mga ksabihan ng mga matatanda belive me... it will just come whenever you're ready...parang iprepresent sau iyon in its perfect time moment kung anu man ung tawag nila...

i think for me... i've asked too early :))...which is not bad at all..ang kinagandahan lng is maaga lng ako namulat sa mga bagay bgay and naging malawak ung understanding ko sa love aspect..

i'll close this post with a simple saying...isa pang changes saken is mahilig ako sa mga inspirational and senseful na mga quotes..

"Success is not final, failure is not fatal: it is the courage to continue that counts. " - Winston Churchill